Swiftys

The New York Times online had a blog post where they asked for people to submit Tom Swifty sentences. I couldn't resist. Here's what I came up with:

"More waffles," Tom said surreptitiously.
"Let us visit Fangorn Forest again," Pippin said complacently.
"We're so glad Ms. Coulter has completed her anger management class," Tom said extemporaneously.
"You can see Turin reflected in the river by night," he said politely.
"I will not eat them in a box. I will not eat them with a fox," Tom said insouciantly.
"Not everyone starts fasting after Mardi Gras," Tom said somnolently.
"There are benefits to being a congressman," Tom said perkily.
"Don't do drugs," Tom said stonily.
"I'd like to go see Star Trek again," Tom said enterprisingly.
"Time to review the federal budget!" Tom said cuttingly.
"Texas has the best state capitol of them all!" Tom remarked ostentatiously.
"The summary of my thesis is over there," Tom muttered abstractly.
"You're going to have to do that math problem again," Tom said reprovingly.
"I like my ice cream blended with milk," Tom said shakily.
"Tell me about Jimmy Hoffa!" Tom demanded.
"This forest has recovered from drought," Tom said with relief.
"I think I'll start an Internet marketing company," Tom said adventurously.
"Of course it's a bear we’re tracking. Can't you see the droppings?" Tom said scathingly.
"That mashup of Pixar's latest film with The Lion King was great!" Tom laughed uproariously.
"I said, we're stuck in a bog!" Tom repeated.
"Will my flight never arrive?" Tom complained.
"Yep, the DNA matches," Tom said genially.
"You've never heard of Google?" asked Tom searchingly.
"Those birds had better not go near my new car..." Tom faltered.

Some other people came up with some pretty funny ones too:

"Matzoh balls and gefilte fish for me", said Tom judiciously.
"C'mon, everyone knows what a UAV is," he droned.
"You're going to need double bypass surgery", said the doctor, halfheartedly.
"Sorry, lady, we're all out of fruit today," he said with aplomb.
"I really dislike reading Hugo," said Les miserably.
"That just doesn't add up," said Tom, nonplussed.
"They've kidnapped the lead actor in our Shakespeare play," said the director deliriously.
"But I'm all for exams!" Tom protested.
"I’ve lost all my hair!" Tom bawled.
"Pringles are chips," the judge ruled crisply.
"What can you tell me about the history of hobgoblins?" Tom asked imploringly.
"I've lost an entire month!" Tom cried, dismayed.
"Have you seen the instructions for the table saw?" Bill asked offhandedly.
"I think we're lost..." he trailed off.
"I had to bail out over enemy territory," Tom explained.
"This isn't even C quality material", said Tom degradingly.
"I'd rather have a real motorcycle," Tom moped.
"You're an inch taller since your last exam," the doctor said gruesomely.
"I much prefer evergreens over deciduous plantings," Randall opined.
"You really inhaled those omelets," said Tom exasperatedly.
"I'm no longer eight years old!" said young Tom benignly.
"I’m sure my boss will reimburse me for this camping trip," said Tom competently.
"You can have the lead role in Taming Of The Shrew!" she said placatingly.
"I've stolen Guevara's puzzle cube," remarked Tom cherubically.
"I can't stay away from those candy bars," Tom snickered.
"She's got my photo in her locket," said Tom independently.
"I prefer satellite radio," he said seriously.
"Justice Ginsburg did not take part in the opinion," the Supreme Court declared ruthlessly.
"I get to read Ulysses again!" Tom rejoiced.
"I don't think I can get dessert down, but I'll try," said the cannibal manfully.
"Are the fish not biting, or did the worm fall off my hook?" Tom debated.
"Who's going to play Nicholas II?" he asked sarcastically.
"Just reel out a little more cable," the TV installer coaxed.
"I'm coming out of hibernation," he summarized.
"Trust me on this - they won't want the kippers", said Tom unerringly.
"I'll have to send that telegram again," Tom said remorsefully.
"That mink coat is on wrong side out," Tom inferred.
"This breakfast cereal is all misshapen!" cried Berlioz.
"I can tell you've eaten a lot of beans," he said astutely.

Adventure walk

Today I asked the girls to come on a walk with me around the block. The main motivation was to give Shannon a few minutes of peace and quiet, but I also wanted to try out an idea I'd had moments before.

As we commenced our journey, I told the girls that it would be an exploring walk, and that they should try to come up with questions about things we encountered that they thought would be interesting to learn more about. I had an index card and pen with me so I could write them down. We wouldn't spend time trying to answer the questions, just collecting them. Here are the questions:

• What makes plants grow a certain shape?


• What does a dandelion look like before it gets white and puffy and you can blow it?


• How does chalk go away (from a sidewalk after it has been used to draw pictures on it)?


• How come some wood stands up (like a fence) while most wood can't?


• What different kinds of metal are there?


• How come leaves fall from the trees?


• Why does the sidewalk sparkle in the sun until you come close to it?


• How do rubber bands keep things together?


• Why do flowers get all beautiful and pretty and then get brown and dead?


• What makes these bumps on the sidewalk?


• How come we have to pull some grass and dandelions out from the garden?


• Why do mountains start getting snow on them early?

Afterward one of the girls wrote in her journal that we took an "adventure walk". Not sure we had an adventure per se, but I enjoyed hearing them wonder out loud about their world.

Hide and Seek

Shannon finally got her hands on Breaking Dawn yesterday and was engrossed in it when I got home from work. I finished making dinner, set the table, called the troops in for chow, and cleaned up afterward. She read, ate dinner, and read. I was perfectly fine with this, as she's extended the same courtesy to me several times in the past.

Then it was time for family night. Alyssa had the lesson and Shannon made sure it was nice and short. Then Shannon met an obstacle in Sarah, who announced that for our activity we would play Hide and Seek, with each family member taking turns to be "it", from youngest to oldest.

(Side note: I have apparently gotten older than Shannon since we married, since she took her turn before I did.)

The game commenced, but Shannon took her book with her and didn't seem to have her heart in the game. When it was finally her turn, she reluctantly put the book down and went to go find everyone. She found me first and then went looking for the children, leaving her book upstairs with me.

In a sudden flash of inspiration (or fit of stupidity), I grabbed the book and stashed it behind the blinds in one of our bathroom windows. Hey, we were playing Hide and Seek, right? Surely she'd be amused and entertained by this turn of events.

Not so. I very nearly set our marriage back twenty years by that action. Even the easy hints ("It's somewhere in this bathroom") were not accepted with appreciation but with gritted teeth and clenched fists. If the children had not been present, I might not have survived.

She finally discovered the book after a few minutes of searching. I'd like to say all was well at that point, but her demeanor toward me was a bit frosty for the next little while, at least until we put the kids to bed, for then she had all the time she wanted to read, while I walked the dog and did some consulting work.

I probably owe her donuts or something.

More Escalante photos

Okay, as promised, here are some more shots from the Escalante adventure. I've reduced the size and quality a bit from the originals in order to save space.

This is at the bank of the reservoir next to which we camped, at a state park just outside the town of Escalante.


Forty miles or so south of Escalante was the trailhead for Coyote Gulch. After a mile or two of hiking from the trailhead, we arrived at the rim and had this view, looking down at the confluence of Coyote Gulch and the Escalante River.


The descent from the rim was at a place called Crack-in-the-Wall, and it's not a figurative name. A sandstone slab has pulled away a couple of feet from the canyon rim, allowing hikers to climb down into the space between for a low-risk descent. Here I am coming out of the crevice, and the following photo shows people at the top beginning to climb down, and a group of the boys who had already gone down are gathered at the bottom. I had to lower my pack down over the slab to the boys below because I didn't think I could get it through the narrow space.



This monolith, probably six or seven hundred feet high, appears to be leaning from this perspective. The area in front was an ancient path of the river, which at some point cut through the meander and left a dry oxbow and this sandstone tower. Our path led down to the left of the tower so we could head upstream through Coyote Gulch.


As we passed the tower, it revealed a beautiful arch (Stevens Arch) behind it. The arch was visible from the rim but more difficult to spot as from that vantage point there was more rock, not sky, to be seen behind it.


Just past the confluence, I thought I'd try for an artistic shot of a spring cottonwood against the sheer sandstone wall.


There were various seeps along the canyon walls and here I am in front of one of them.


I quite like the composition of this shot.


The Waterfall Gnome.


Another waterfall; there were probably five or so that we had to climb around.


An arch forming in the wall of the canyon.


Coyote Natural Bridge, through which we had to hike. It was about 5:00 PM when we got here and the lighting was perfect.


Finally, the exit. We had to scramble up this sandstone fin, which was at probably a 30 degree angle but which felt like 60 degrees with the exposure. Our trip leader, an experienced rock climber, anchored a rope so we could climb with some security. It was still a real gut-check for me, with my acrophobia. I didn't go up with my pack on as I was both tired and very nervous about being able to maintain my balance and hold on the rope. Somehow I made it, going hand-over-hand with the rope (no harness or knot around me!) up the hill. My camera I left in the pack, so these shots are a progressive panorama up the hill as I gathered my courage to make the attempt.




The first group to finish the ascent, of which I was part, went ahead and hiked back to the vehicles while the other group was still working on the ascent. My pack was with the second group, so those were the last of the photos for that day. It was dusk when we were hiking back anyway, and we made it out just before it got too dark to spot the cairns that marked the way back. Fortunately, the vehicles were nearly due south of the exit, and with the full moon rising in the east we were not at great risk of getting lost.

All total, it was 10.7 miles of hiking. I enjoyed it enormously despite the fatigue and the fear of the climb out. The canyons of southern Utah are magnificent and I don't ever see myself getting tired of visiting them. The scouts did a great job with few complaints and no incidents (that I know of) requiring a scolding. I was very proud of them for handling the hike so well.

I have higher resolution versions of these photos if anyone likes one well enough to want a print.

Passage

This is my favorite photo from my recent hiking/camping trip in the Escalante area with the Scouts. It's a natural bridge in Coyote Gulch. I'll try to upload more photos from the excursion in the near future.

Not in the sense of chopped pickles

A few things I've relished recently:

• Standing in the shade of the pines on a sunny winter day, peering at the moose that's made a bed for itself in the middle of the cross-country ski trail.
• Rediscovering some songs I hadn't heard for years, courtesy of my co-workers' iTunes libraries.
• Hearing Alyssa mimic conversation by declaring, "wizugigagawazagah."
• Hearing a chorus of "Dad!" (or "Daaaaah!") when I come through the kitchen door at the end of the workday.
• Listening to Emmie experiment on the piano or say adorable things, and seeing her suddenly shine a great big grin at me.
  
• Introducing Sarah to the concept of atoms and molecules.
• Spending time with Shannon, whether by doing a jigsaw puzzle together (she sorts the pieces while I locate their final position), playing board games (Ticket to Ride and Sequence have been popular lately), attempting duets on the piano, or going out for a few hours with the kids in the care of a babysitter.
• Hearing one of the boy scouts, tired after long exertion, wonder aloud how I seemed to have so much energy left.
• Clearing ice from the driveway entrance with Rob's help.
• Building the sturdiest temporary gate you ever did see, under the tutelage of a skilled engineer, on a winter's evening in my own garage.
• Experiencing the snowiest winter I've seen since I was eight.
• Doing a bit of voluntary scientific research (actually related to my master's degree) to satisfy my curiosity on a question, sharing the results with others who had the same question, and receiving positive feedback as well as useful criticism.
• Writing a small program in a language I didn't know before, that will save me hours of work on a task I frequently have to do for my job.
  

Run, Cheeth!

I don't know what you did to enrage them, but they're coming for you.